6.5.16

It's Sunday and I'm proud because I got a lot done on my business plan.  The day started with a very powerful church service where Pastor Battle gave a great sermon on growing up.  Aside from the personal and spiritual tips, he also spoke on something that really hit home with me.

Not many people know this, but CAMP was born after I suffered a very painful loss. I found out that I was pregnant in July 2015, but had a miscarriage on Sept. 9, 2015. It was the most devastating day of my life and I didn't know what to do.  Thankfully, after suffering in sadness for a few days, I was able to get up, go to bikram and move on with my life.

A day or so later, the thought to move forward with opening CAMP came to me. I had toyed around with it before, but really decided to work at it (or at least give it ALL that I possibly could). It's like God took one baby from me so that I could focus on this new baby... one that will cause me to grow up probably more than I have in a LONG time.

Which leads me back to today's lesson. Once way that individuals grow is through experiencing  suffering/sorrow. When I lost my unborn baby, I had to get up and grow up, and be even more focused on growing in that very painful moment and in MY purpose (which is this new business venture that is unlike anything I've ever attempted before).  Suffering is also a prerequisite for growth. Growth happens when we are in the valley and not we are at the top of the mountain.

Additionally, by moving forward towards my purpose after the loss, I am forced to ward off addictions and behaviors that may (re)surface during the sad time.  These behaviors are more likely to come out when there's nothing left to focus on and live for (like my family). Now, I just think about CAMP and dream about what it WILL be, and my mind and spirit are stimulated.

Hearing those words and seeing how that one loss ultimately led to where we are today was powerful. I cried, laughed and pondered on what I've experienced.

I think losing my baby has jaded me about having another, but if that's God's will, I will accept it.

The season if my life is changing and I must grow and change with it.